For those that have been following my blog in the last week or so, it has been generally overtaken by meditations on the place of pain in our lives, me questioning my worth, and more specifically regarding a trial my my wife, Lisa, is going through.
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Let me cut to the chase: I don’t know my worth. Am unsure of it, constantly questioning, probing, trying to find my place.
Don’t misunderstand: I know what the Bible says, that Christ loved me enough–loved us all enough–to die. But I sometimes feel lost.
Like this week. Life is harder than it’s been in a long time.
I mean, I know we’re not dying and all.
But it’s been a hard week–a hard couple of weeks.
You know that Offspring #1 had mono, right? That he missed a week of school?
My thanks to everyone who’s praying for Lisa. It’s a frustrating, odd place for her to be as a wife and a mom–where she has to rely on others to get quotidian activities accomplished. And as much as this alone frustrates her, I’m certain that the pain all but pushes it from her mind.
Proverbs 26:11 (ESV) says, “Like a dog that returns to his vomit is a fool who repeats his folly.”
If an addict can be likened to the fool in the above verse, then the “folly” is his addiction. He knows it’s bad, the stench wafting from it makes him gag, yet he can’t help himself.