Archives For Ricky Anderson

The Beggar’s Billions

randomlychad  —  December 20, 2013 — 7 Comments

“The Beggar’s billions,” he said. “We’ve got work to do.” It was then that his appearance changed before me: where a moment before stood Lucifer, Prince of Darkness, now stood a figure familiar to billions:

A rotund, jolly, jowly red-cheeked, bearded man bedecked in a festal red suit. Where there had been cloven hooves there were now black boots.

“Come along, Rancidspoor, we’ve the Beggar’s billions to deceive,” he said, donning his Santa cap. “Ready to be an elf?”

“Tis the season,” I replied, reflecting upon the chance encounter with Beelzebub in the lower echelons which led to this sugar plum of an assignment.

“Ho, ho, ho,” Santa said. “Let’s go.”

—————-

This piece is part of a sudden writing challenge issued by Joseph Craven and Ricky Anderson. The requirements were to:

Call the story “Beggar’s Billions”
Have a Santa cap
Include a chance encounter

I had fun doing this, and look forward to future challenges.

Let’s Get Political

randomlychad  —  October 5, 2012 — 8 Comments

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Today’s post comes to you via the irrepressible Ricky Anderson. He’s an IT guy by day, husband to his wife, Jana, and daddy to their miracle son, Evan. You can follow him on Twitter @Arthur2Sheds (ask him there about his “2 sheds”–he likes it!). I would direct you to his Facebook page, but he doesn’t have one! So come like mine instead: Randomlychad. (Ricky won’t mind).

Let’s Get Political!

It’s happening, whether you want it to or not.

The elections are just around the corner. First, we’ll dress up like idiots and send our blood sugar levels to the moon, and then we’ll shake off the carb hangover by electing the free world’s next leader.

I have a challenge for you during these elections -speak the truth in love.

I can’t count the number of vile, hateful and flat-out lies I’ve received in my email inbox from fellow Christians.

Ephesians 4:15 tells us to speak the truth in love.

You may not like that certain candidate. You may disagree with him. But you must not slander him. If you tell lies about him, you are wrong.

And even if he does eat puppies, kick babies and cheer for the Yankees, you must only speak the truth about him in love.

Truth without love is meaningless. 1 Corinthians tells us to speak without love makes you only a clanging cymbal. You’re just noisy…and obnoxious.

So for these elections, go ahead – vote for your favorite politician. Get involved, watch the debates. Just make sure to check your facts, and check your tone.

And whatever you do, don’t cheer for the Yankees. They cause global warming. Which, were he yet among the living, even George Steinbrenner would acknowledge is An Inconvenient Truth.

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Folks, I’m privileged this year to join an elite group of fellow bloggers on the field of battle. Our fearless leader is Maximus Decimus Meridius, who will have his revenge in this life, or the next.

Wait–that’s not right. Our team captain is Ricky “I have 2 Sheds” Anderson. If you followed the festivities last year, you’ll recall that “Team Ricky” was doing quite well until Jon Acuff got wind of the fact he was on “Team Rob.”

After that, it was pretty much game, set, and match.

But you can change all that. Internet, you have a chance to right a wrong, rectify an injustice, help Maximus be reunited with his wife…

Oops, again that’s not right. My bad.

What I’m asking you–sane, level-headed souls that you are–is to please head over to Rob Shepherd’s blog, and vote Team Ricky. (Click right there where it says “Rob Shepherd’s blog” to be taken to the post and poll).

Vote early, vote often, vote from multiple computers. Clear your browser’s cache, and vote again. Vote from your smartphone, your tablet, or other Internet-connected device. Write your congressman, enlist your family, call a meeting of your HOA–JUST PLEASE GET OUT THE VOTE!

Sure, there’s a pesky presidential election this year, but who cares? This is far more important. Besides, that’s not ’til November–vote now!

Joining me, under the auspices of Captain Ricky, are:

Tor “the Sleep-Deprived” Constantino .

Jamie “Rabbit Trails” Golden

Monica “the Other Captain’s Wife” Shepherd

Amanda “She’s The” Bast

Kevin “the Isle of Man” Haggerty

Renee A. “I Will School You” Schuls-Jacobson

Joseph “I’ve Never Hunted Spider-Man in My Life” Craven

Paul “not the BBQ sauce guy” Johnson (Bill is the BBQ sauce guy, in case you were wondering).

Jessica “Callipygean” Buttram

So that’s the team. Remember to head over to RobShep.com , and vote Team Ricky.

Tell him, I “randomly” sent you.

What are you doing still reading this? GO VOTE!!!!!

Did you vote?

Vote already.

Peace out.

So, Ricky Anderson pretty much badgered me via text yesterday about how he was going to bring our IT Wars, 2012, to a stunning, epic conclusion today.

He used DEFINITIVELY (like that, in ALL CAPS) so much, I felt like:

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DEFINITIVELY.

Then he conceded defeat.

DEFINITIVELY.

Anywho, as I agreed to not write a rebuttal today, that’s all I have to say about the IT Wars; rather, I’d like to highlight some of Ricky’s best work, such as:

A Specimen of Embarrassment. Like Quantum of Solace, but starring Ricky. It is indeed as epic, awesome, and hilarious as it sounds. James Bond: eat your heart out.

The preceding DEFINITIVELY represents funny Ricky, but the following shows his serious, dare I say, heartfelt side:

Daddy’s Got You Covered

Anywho, despite the tonal differences in the two pieces, the second would DEFINITIVELY not exist without his undergoing the former.

If you asked, I’m sure Ricky would tell you the same. Wait for it…

DEFINITIVELY.

————-

On a serious note, he’s been a good sport throughout our mock war. And more than that, he’s “good peoples.” You can follow him on Twitter @Arthur2Sheds, and read his blog at Ricky Anderdon Dot Net – Always On Sale

Peace put, peeps! Make a great weekend!

Last week, you read of how Ricky Anderson hacked my system, deleted my music, and filed my taxes (without the simple courtesy of paying them).

You may have also read my response, wherein I worked everything out with my IRS buddies, and launched a grassroots campaign to get Ricky on Facebook.

This week, I’m thrilled to report that, through the magic of IT, I’ve gained access to Ricky’s email account (believe me: it’s a scary place). I can’t wait to start emailing all of his buddies! It will be epic.

Oh, you don’t believe me? Feast your eyes on:

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That’s right–I have full access to Ricky’s Monty Python-themed email account (go ahead–ask him about his sheds).

Now, what to do, what to do?

I know. Since he hasn’t yet entered that pesky Facebook verification code, I’ll go ahead and do it for him:

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You’re welcome! 😉

Folks, anything else I should do to Ricky before he catches on?