Archives For friendship

Bad At Acquaintances

randomlychad  —  November 13, 2014 — 10 Comments

I don’t know about you, but I’m bad at being acquaintances. Friendships for me are more binary; they are on, or off. You see, I’m generally an introvert; as such, I’ve never had a lot of friends. And the ones I do have mean very much to me.

Probably more than is healthy, to be honest.

As an introvert, I find small talk boring. Much preferred is the diving into the deep, messy stuff of life. I’m finding, however, through age and experience that not everyone is wired like that. That in fact I may have someone in the friend column who has me in their acquaintance column.

We’re at cross purposes, having differing expectations of the relationship. This always makes me sad, and leaves feeling like an outsider. To be blunt, it never fails to catch me off guard. You would think I would have learned by now, but No! It hooks right into the latent abandonment issues bound up in my soul. It’s not true, but it feels like ever since my dad left my family over thirty years ago people are always leaving me.

I feel forgotten, wondering what I did to make them go. I wish it weren’t so, but I get pouty and lash out. Which becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts.

Who wants to be around that?

I’m trying to surround myself with healthy community, but it’s hard to let people in, you know? Heck, it’s hard to let God in, to relate to Him. <--Have you been there? Where all of your prayers feel like so much dust flung at an uncaring sky, dissipated by the wind? That's the place I find myself in. Who am I in relation to: You Myself God I find my view of Him is still refracted by the prism given me by my earthly daddy. I want to let Him in--all the way in--but I don't know how. He wants to be more than mere acquaintance. He deserves more. How do I, the man who struggles with frienship, give Him what He longs for? Have you been there, my friends?

You Did It!

randomlychad  —  June 23, 2012 — 7 Comments

Thank-you to all who gave, prayed, tweeted, facebooked, and encouraged me! You did it! Because of your kindness, I’m going to the Wild at Heart bootcamp this August! I want to sincerely thank each and every one of you from the bottom of my heart for helping me rewrite my life’s story.

And look what a story we told together this week!

All week long, those doubts assailed me: “Who are you to ask for help this way? These people have families to feed, bills to pay.”

But we all know who’s voice that is, don’t we? He who masquerades as an angel of light, who roams around as a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. We Christians know him as the enemy.

And he’s a liar!

This week, you bathed me in kindness, you covered me in prayer, you showed me just how much you care.

You showed me the meaning of community, and like Robert Frost said “that has made all the difference.”

Thank-you again from the bottom of my heart!

Chad

'Pacifier anyone?' photo (c) 2011, Philipp Antar - license: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

After reading Ricky’s post–“One Paci to Rule Them All”–yesterday, I was reminded of my own children, and their interest (or lack thereof) in their own respective pacifiers.

Thus, I give you “Paci Throwdown:”

When my son was one, he threw his paci down
Mom, not being ready, retrieved it with a frown

She popped it back in, and to her chagrin,

Back it went, down on the ground,

For five full minutes this went on,

Out! It popped, back in it went,
Until mother and child, both were spent,

But mom would not relent,

And in the end, she won:
Forcing that paci back on our son

And to my chagrin, you see,
He kept it til he was three

Would that were the end of the story:
My daughter, nary a paci will she use,
When asked, she has refused,
A thumb sucker, in all her glory

—————-

You can catch Ricky on his blog, Ricky Anderson Dot Net, or follow him on Twitter @Arthur2Sheds (though I’m told he only has one shed)

You see it there, right? Right there in the title of this post–“fiend.”

Who do I mean? Who is this “fiend?”

Bryan Allain.

What do I mean?

He did this to me:

This Bryan Allain.

That’s right–I play words with this fiend!

He’s cutthroat, he’s lean…

And he’s mean!

This Bryan Allain.

Play him yourself.

You’ll see what I mean!

(search for ‘bryanallain’)

*By the by, I’m given to understand that his last name is French Canadian, so one pronounces it “Eileen.” Or so I’m told. 😉

Today’s hilarious guest post comes from my friend, Larry Carter. You know–John (“of Mars”) Carter’s funny brother. <--Don't actually know if he has a brother named John. Anyway, Larry is loved by multitudes, is a husband, and father, and claims this is the most ridiculous thing he's ever written. Take it away, Larry: I have a lot of conversations with myself. A lot of them end with bacon. For example: “T.G.I.F.” <--This is either a restaurant, or it: “Sounds like the intro to a Katy Perry song.” [What? You mean like "E.T.," (pronounced "et") right? "Heart attack victim, fill me with some bacon"] And... You listen to Katy Perry? I thought you were a Christian? Uh, I did when she was Katy Hudson. “I wonder how Katy Perry made the transition from Katy Hudson, Christian singer, and morphed into Katy Perry, girl-kissing, pop-singing wife of Russell Brand?” [My guess? Not enough fatty, protein-rich bacon in her diet] Isn't that what happened to Amy Grant? No, she married Vince Gil--not Russell Brand. “No, I mean Amy Grant sang Christian music and crossed over to pop.” Oh, yeah, "Baby, Baby," right? “Yeah, but she had that song with Peter Cetera.” “All I Need To Know.” No, that was Aaron Nevill and Linda Ronstadt. Stay on task with me, please. Amy and Peter had "Next Time I Fall In Love." [Ed. note: Amy did sing "House of Love" with Vince Gill--while still married to Gary. We know how that turned out. Also, the next time I fall in love, it will be with bacon!] Peter Cetera was in Chicago, right? 25 or 6 to 4!!!! “I thought Richard Gere was in Chicago.” That was a musical, not the pop group. “Richard Gere was also in "Pretty Woman" with Julia Roberts.” I thought he was in "An Officer and A Gentleman" with Debra Winger? He was, but you're getting off task again. Stick with me. He was in "Pretty Woman" with Julia Roberts. Julia Roberts was also in "Mystic Pizza," right? "Yeah, but not what I'm looking for---though I'll bet her pizzas had bacon on them." Ok, Alex, give me another Julia Roberts movie, please, for 1000. Erin Brockovich? [Best line in that film? "They're called boobs, Ed."] Ocean's Eleven? No. Try again. “Oh yeah. Julia Roberts was in "Flatliners" with Kiefer Sutherland.” Yes!!! But guess who else was in that movie? No!!! Not him. Really? Yes, no denying it. Kevin Bacon? Yep. “Kevin Bacon makes me think of bacon.” [Which makes me think of the recently remade "Footloose. Did Kevin get cameo? No? If it tanks at the box office, we know why: Decided lack of Bacon] “Since it’s Friday, I’ll stop at T.G.I Friday's on the way home from work to get a BLT. Hope Jan doesn't notice I'm not hungry." “Sounds like a plan.” And that, my friends, is how all roads lead to bacon. And bacon makes me happy. How many steps does it take you to get to bacon?

Larry Carter lives in “Dunn Holler,” somewhere outside of Knoxville, TN. He blogs most days at Deuceology, and can be followed on Twitter @LarryTheDeuce. Roll tide, Larry, roll tide! 😉