Quit Pretending You’re Alright

randomlychad  —  January 25, 2013 — 3 Comments
Photo by David Johnston Art

Today’s post was originally posted by me, (Jim Woods) back in April 2012 here. It was one of the first posts I had ever written that REALLY dug deeper and was more revealing than the rest. It kind of opened the flood gates for me. I’d like to thank Chad for this opportunity and also my friend David Johnston for allowing me to use this great picture. 

I like to pretend I’m alright.

I won’t often admit that I’m screwed up.

I try to get my act together, but I can’t help it.

I’m disorganized.

I’m lazy.

I lack in focus.

I get distracted by any bright, shiny toy.

I have a zillion things bouncing around in my head.

Many of those thoughts are toxic.

Yet I try to pretend I’m okay.

Ask me how I am and the answer of “okay” or “fine” pops out.

On my best days, I’m just a little bit less messed up than usual.

But then I talk to you.

We interact.

We share. 

We fill each other’s holes. 

The gaps aren’t as empty.

And we both know we’re not alone. 

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randomlychad

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Christ-follower, husband, dad, blogger, reader, writer, movie buff, introvert, desert-dweller, omnivore, gym rat. May, or may not, have a burgeoning collection of Darth Vader t-shirts. Can usually be found drinking protein shakes, playing with daughter, working out with his son, or hanging out with his wife. Makes a living playing with computers. Subscribe to RandomlyChad by Email

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  • What an honest, heartfelt post Jim. You could feel the depth from which you wrote this. I’m an “okay”, “fine” kind of person too, so this resonates with me. You wrote:

    “But then I talk to you.

    We interact.

    We share.

    We fill each other’s holes.

    The gaps aren’t as empty.”

    You hit it right on the head. Love this Jim. Great post!

  • the gaps aren’t as empty. have always loved this post, jim!

    • I’ve been spending time confronting my wrong-headed thinking, and have come realize that:

      1) I’ve been expecting others to meet my “God need;”

      2) Expecting God to meet my needs for community.

      This is monumentally unfair to both parties, because:

      God meets my God need, but while providing the means to meet other needs, He doesn’t directly meet them.

      My wrong thinking lead to bad choices, and a lot of blaming. But ultimately I am responsible for me, and my choices.

      And that is so very freeing.

      Which means that now “the gaps aren’t as empty.”

      Great post, Jim!