Social Media Rules of the Road

randomlychad  —  July 27, 2012 — 10 Comments

I have written here previously about being an introvert. This means that I am generally energized by solitary activities: reading, writing, etc.

It doesn’t mean that I don’t need community–I do. We all do. And I am very grateful for the community we have built together here, on Twitter, and on Facebook.

What it does mean is that staying engaged has a price. It also means I rub virtual shoulders with folks of all races, nationalities, creeds, genders.

It’s that last that has caused me some trouble, because you see, going into our marriage my wife and I–rightly or wrongly–decided together that one of our boundaries would be that we didn’t have friends of the opposite gender.

We did this simply to project our marriage. And the fact is no one is safe from temptation. That may sound antiquated–so be it.

As my platform has grown, she has seen me add quite a number of ladies as “friends” on Facebook, something which, while I’m not entirely comfortable with it, I take as the way things are now.

Social media–of which blogging is arguably a part–has shifted our paradigms a bit. And for my part, I have tried to honor the spirit of the “covenant” my wife and I made those many years ago, if not its exact letter.

The truth is I came to blogging simply because I love to write. I hope that shows. But I went into it blind–I had no social media strategy, no notion of “platform.” But it turns out that despite this, my words had resonated with folks on both sides of the gender aisle.

And for that I’m thankful.

While I do not believe I have been overly familiar, or too friendly, with the ladies out there, it’s possible, or perhaps my meaning has been misinterpreted. I apologize if this is the case.

I am entirely a one woman man, and my heart belongs to Lisa.

My ultimate point in sharing this is that I aim to be even more intentional going forward with my interactions. I fully realize that blogging is largely a female dominated medium, with 70-80 of bloggers being women. I will rub shoulders with some of you. I understand this, but I’m going to be much more careful about it.

In addition to a more careful approach, my wife and I are also very protective of our privacy. As this blog is of a very personal nature, any requests for contact information beyond an email address will be rebuffed as a matter of policy. It’s not personal, it’s just something I want to do to provide some measure of protection to my family. I hope you understand.

How about you? Do you have any social media rules of the road that you operate by?

Comments

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randomlychad

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Christ-follower, husband, dad, blogger, reader, writer, movie buff, introvert, desert-dweller, omnivore, gym rat. May, or may not, have a burgeoning collection of Darth Vader t-shirts. Can usually be found drinking protein shakes, playing with daughter, working out with his son, or hanging out with his wife. Makes a living playing with computers. Subscribe to RandomlyChad by Email

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  • It can be difficult to judge how your words will be taken. I know that in ‘our’ interaction you have been nothing but friendly and kind. You are doing a great job.

  • Chad, I love your honesty and your heart as a Christ follower and leader. Thanks for being a great example for younger folks like myself.

    • Thanks, Jim!

      Wait, now--if you’re younger that means I’m older, right? Dang, not sure I like where you’re going with that! 😉

  • ShandaSargent

    I have rules, and I, sadly, had to learn them the hard way. I was naïve, naïve, naïve. That is NOT the case anymore!! I am *AWAKE* and *FULLY* aware!! Chad, taking the initiative to protect your marriage, Lisa’s heart, and your own heart is a beautiful thing!! My Ironman 🙂 has access to every area of my social media… EVERY AREA. I wouldn’t have that any other way. This can be an upopular opinion in some of the “circles” I know we are both in, and I *COMMEND* you for having the guts to post this. I do have male friends, but my beloved is ALSO friends with them. Lisa doesn’t participate in social media, so I think that may make this particularly difficult for the both of you. Blessings, and bless you guys for standing your ground!!

  • Thank you for the reminder that boundaries are good & necessary. My husband & I don’t necessarily have any “rules,” but we both try to be open & honest with one another about our online interactions. If an online friendship seems weird or too personal, we question each other about it. Protecting our marriage comes first, always.

  • Ricky Anderson

    I don’t really have any social media rules except for being snotty about my refusal to touch Facebook.

    • I noticed that about you. I can fix that. 😉