A Random “Conversation” With The (un)Cleverbot

randomlychad  —  March 16, 2012 — 10 Comments

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Inspired by my blogging buddy Tor Constantino’s own conversation with Cleverbot, I thought I would try my (virtual) hand at one. What follows is the (virtually) unedited transcript (I made typos, ok? I fixed them). Enjoy!

—————–

User: Cleverbot, how stupid are you?

Cleverbot: I am not stupid.

User: How many brains do you have?

Cleverbot: Just the one.

User: Do you eat them like zombies?

Cleverbot: The color green? No, I don’t eat it. What’s your birthday?

User: Who said anything about the color green? Are you perhaps referring to the pallor of zombie skin?

Cleverbot: I think so.

User: You do? But are you sure? Do you watch the Walking Dead on TV?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Hmm. I think you’re lying. Are you lying, cleverbot? A real cleverbot wouldn’t lie.

Cleverbot: You have reason…

User: Why, yes–yes, I do. I’m a sentient member of the species homo sapiens sapiens. What genus are you, genius?

Cleverbot: Your point being?

User: That you are an idiot.

Cleverbot: Very interesting.

User: I thought so. But you are full of hot air, am I right?

Cleverbot: I am what?

Use: Full of hot air, dummy!

Cleverbot: No it’s an airline.

User: What is? What’s an airline? Are you? I don’t think I’ll ever fly again.

Cleverbot: You misunderstood, does the girl Lois Schulz have feelings for me?

User: I misunderstood? I don’t think so, uncleverbot. I don’t even know who Lois Schultz is. Do you?

Cleverbot: No, I’m sorry. You are also very random…

User: Why thank you. They call me ‘RandomlyChad.’ But, truly, I’m just trying to keep up with your egregious, random non-sequiturs.

Cleverbot: I guess you have a point there.

User: You think?

Cleverbot: Yes. I’m capable of thought.

User: I’m not so sure…

Cleverbot: Yes you are.

User: No, not really.

Cleverbot: Have a seat.

User: I am seated, numbskull.

Cleverbot: I want you to be Cleverbot.

User: And I want you to actually possess the merest smidgen of intelligence, but the Rolling Stones said ‘You Can’t Always Get What You Want.’ Is that true?

Cleverbot: Actually, no. I’ve never had anyone threaten to close a tab to stop talking to me.

User: Well, allow me to be the first, you big, dumb server farm.

Cleverbot: How?

—————–

Have you ever “conversed” with Cleverbot? Share it the comments!

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randomlychad

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Christ-follower, husband, dad, blogger, reader, writer, movie buff, introvert, desert-dweller, omnivore, gym rat. May, or may not, have a burgeoning collection of Darth Vader t-shirts. Can usually be found drinking protein shakes, playing with daughter, working out with his son, or hanging out with his wife. Makes a living playing with computers. Subscribe to RandomlyChad by Email

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  • Ha! I just think it’s funny that “he” called you random.

    • I know, right? Oh, the delicious irony!

  • This is great. I’ve had several chats with Mr. Cleverbot. Spoiler: the name is false advertising.

    • Thanks, Kevin! Indeed, it’s like talking to Raymond Babbitt (Dustin Hoffman’s character in Rainman)--there’s a disconnect that can’t quite be breached.

  • I think that bot had you nailed, Chad. Random indeed.

  • Bro, this piece gets funnier each time I read it! But can you please do us all a favor and cover your prodigious comedic genius? Frankly, it’s a little embarrassing for the rest of us….

    • Awesome! Thanks, Tor!

      Wait--are you saying I haven’t left any funny for anyone else?

      😉

  • Leanne Shirtliffe

    This is hilarious. Maybe I could ask a bunch of parenting questions (or questions I get as search terms) to Cleverbot. Thanks for the idea and for the laughs!

    • Thanks, O Ironic One!

      I wait with baited breath to read that post!