It’s annual tradition around these parts: my mom takes my oldest, J-Dog, out for lunch–and to buy him a costume.
Inevitably, dad “tries” it on. (All photographic evidence from prior years has been destroyed). What you are about to see is, I think, supposed to be a “Zorro” hat; however, on me, it looks decidedly Amish (though perhaps my beard looks more like the victim of one of those recent scissor attacks, than it does an epic Amish one).
Without further ado:

Your mission–should you choose to accept it–is to suitably caption that photo. (Try to keep it PG-13, ok?)
As with Matt “the Seeking Pastor” Cannon, you’ll have my thanks. And best/funniest caption wins a guest post here on RandomlyChad.
Go captioneers! What are you waiting for?